Friday, September 22, 2006


well noah and david and i spent some quality time together tonight since i leave in the morning for scrapfest in edmonton. i can't believe my baby will be 4 months old soon! we think he is starting to teeth - grumpiness, drooling, a bit of a fever and some small bumps on his gums point to signs of teething. sigh, he is growing up so fast.

i was looking at these pictures tonight and thinking about the fact that noah has double eyelids while i have single eyelids. in fact, we saw a chinese family the other night and they said "noah has the coveted double eyelids" - the only way i can explain it is that i have the very typical asian eyelids - with a single fold. this makes eye makeup and stuff look like crap on me. noah has the "coveted" double eyelids which means an extra fold and also some other things...

here is the funny thing, in asia, you can get surgery to get the fold in your eyelid so you look more "western". that is a big deal in that culture for some. also in my wedding photos taken in hong kong, they actually TAPED ME SOME DOUBLE EYELID FOLDS! LOL! david didn't recognize me after they spackled on the makeup and taped my lids.

all of that made me think about why we can't accept beauty in people for who they are - why do we want to look western? i can remember growing up someone who was close to me (and was also chinese) told me "well you are pretty for an asian girl but you will never look as good as the white girls- b/c you will be plain" - gee what a blow to a 10 year old's self esteem. that is something i can laugh about now and roll my eyes at but at that time, it was so important to fit in and to hear that from someone i respected really made for some hard times growing up. and frankly that really hurt at the time. that is something i will remember for the rest of my life even though i am past it now.

NO WONDER i didn't smile in pictures for about 15 years. but all of that doesn't matter now. these are things i can laugh about. and what doesn't kill you makes you stronger. it took me a while to accept what i looked like - single eyelids and all but i am here and as you can see in the pictures, so very happy. i could go through life struggling with my single eyelids but life is too short (and i am too fiery to do so).

have a great weekend!


At 9/22/2006 09:33:00 AM, Blogger Shirley said...

from one single eyelid gal to another - you're HOT! And love the new pictures!

At 9/22/2006 09:33:00 AM, Blogger Shirley said...

OK, that sounds funny but you know what I mean. LOL!

At 9/22/2006 01:19:00 PM, Blogger Deborah said...

I have 15 years of photos to prove the smiling thing... :) But I think you are beautiful, and since I sort of look like you, it is a good thing too!

At 9/23/2006 04:10:00 AM, Anonymous Greta said...

WOW! Who would have thunk it?? I never would have guessed there was an eyelid "envy" of sorts. I too wish that EVERYONE, EVERYWHERE first looked to what's inside a person to see their beauty. Some dream of world peace, I dream of a world-wide inner beauty priority! I've seen some very visually beautiful people be truly inner ugly!

At 9/25/2006 12:20:00 PM, Blogger Heather M. said...

Adorable photos, Caroline!!!!!! You are absolutely beautiful, inside and out, and I truly mean that! It's so sad that we, especially women, have such a hard time accepting who we are and what we look like and seeing the beauty God has given us. Life is too short to be unhappy - thank you for the reminder!
I'm so very glad I got to meet you this weekend! I wish we could have hung out longer!

At 9/25/2006 01:09:00 PM, Blogger Anam said...

you are so beautiful and sweet. you were a joy to met at scrapfest. I love the look asian girls have - i see that as true beauty. anam

At 9/25/2006 03:59:00 PM, Blogger Sue said...

Well, first off - is Noah getting CUTER?? How is that possible???
Secondly, I too was unaware of the whole eyelid envy thing - I for one am envious of Asian women - their lovely almond shaped eyes, their beautiful skin and (usually)straight dark hair... Isn't it always true that we want what we don't have?
Be proud and true to who you are, C - it adds to your beauty that is already within - and out!

At 9/27/2006 09:18:00 AM, Anonymous Melissa Diekema said...

I knew about the whole eyelid thing.... and I have always though that Asian women are absolutely gorgeous - I am jealous of their gorgeous black hair! Go figure - I don't think women are ever happy with how they look and that stinks.


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